The: “Baby I Need A Break” Hilarious Joke!

couple break-up in a relationship

When I come to think about it, I bet we all asked for a ‘break’ in a relationship..  Back when we were 10!!!!

Well, guess what? Some people are still doing it, and seriously I can’t hold back my laughter whenever I hear it, especially when it comes with a serious tone and a sigh: “Ahh! Haven’t you heard? We’re on a break” (cracks me up!). Here’s the deal, there’s no such a thing as a ‘break’ people! Regardless of whom asked for it, truth is they’re fed up and want to break up! But the word “up” used after “break” clearly has such a drama effect so they prefer not to use it keeping a space of hope that doesn’t exist! So, Sweetheart, if you’re on a break, I’m sorry to tell you it’s over!
See, Lebanese in general are not stupid, at all! On the contrary, I believe we’re gifted, precisely with the ability of lying in the face and making anyone even ourselves believe in that lie! We can play dumb and stupid whenever we feel like it, we’re so good at it that we end up lost between what’s true and what’s not! We can tell you anything and you’d believe it just like that! We say I love you a billion times a day to the extent that it has lost its meaning! Whether we mean it or not we say it to our friends, relatives, bosses, colleagues, co-workers and our dog! It’s like we lack so much affection that we just need to say those three words! Hi, I LOVE YOU, ok bye! (Just said it, I feel much better now!).

When a couple breaks upTrue feelings and emotions are so old-fashioned nowadays, no one admits they’re in love, there’s always the: “I’m not so sure “clash; no one knows how to love anymore yet everyone knows how to weep after a break up! Regardless of how much we’re familiar with the word ‘love’ , when it come to relationships it’s a Disaster! Some blessed people seem to  appreciate what they have; those are the ‘thankful’ ones, a word most of this generation is not quite familiar with. The word they acquaint with now is ‘complicated’. There are pretty messed up people with messed up emotions, getting themselves into affairs and long term relationships they don’t know how to stray from. Somehow people think a ‘break’ is the perfect refuge and escape!
Here’s the typical common argument:
Men’s version: “Baby it’s you not you, it’s you me, you’re okay perfect, you’re dreaming if you think ill marry you everyone’s dream BUT I am fed up have problems at work (WTF) and Its been months that I like this gorgeous girl next door, she won’t go out with me because I’m in a relationship with you and damn she has a fine ass need to focus on my future!! I’m not gonna be available all the time for you because I will be so busy fooling her with my charm I need to be with myself for a while! Let’s take this temporary break and if it doesn’t work out with the other women I will probably be back because apparently you’re the only one I can get, but I don’t think I’ll survive a day without you! I Wish I love you!


Women’s version: “Baby it’s you not you, it’s you me, I deserve better am too young for a serious commitment, I am not crazy about you because I’m obsessed with the idea that you’re not good enough for me am crazy about you but I don’t want to be selfish (!) I wana have fun, plus everyone think I’m such a doll who’s going out with such a loserwana focus on my future, I just graduated and this is getting serious very fast! Please understand that I’m doing this for ME US! I’m adorable and can get anyone I want nothing without you! You are standing in the way complete me!!

A ‘break’ could take months! Yes! Somehow the time they’ve given for each other’s is never good enough they need more time to fool around realize what they want (failed expectation)! Of course the one who broke up would be having the time of his life, leaving the poor other person on the hook anxiously wishing upon a star!!! He/she would be experiencing the worst days of their life! They won’t know whether to make use of the break or dramatize about it! The dilemma!
How it ends? It depends on the amount of luck they both encounter! Usually it’s a definite break up, but some people are such losers that they fail to function outside their familiar zone (their exes) so they go back to what’s safe, not that they’ll be convinced with the decision they’ve made, they simply give in to the fact that’s all they can get. That’s where the expression “You never know what you have until you lose it” pops up! It’s such a dumb saying! We’re not blind, we’re not retards and when a person wana break free from the other person it means that something‘s missing and they can’t take it for granted nor adapt with it. People wana believe it’s true only because it plays with their minds!
Sample:
Girl 1: But he broke up with me!!
Girl 2: Babe he’ll realize what he lost with time
Girl 1: but it’s been 10 years already!
Girl 2: who cares! Give him more time! He’ll be back you’ll see.

Probably he will, using that same statement only not meaning a word of it: ‘Baby, I’ve been fooling around lost without you, you popped  into my mind out of nowhere were always on my mind, but I’ve been checking you out on you and now that you lost some weight I want you more I see you’re doing fine without me! I ‘ve been rejected so many times and I got bored of tryingdidn’t have the guts to tell you how I feel fearing that you won’t take me back. See, baby (Here it comes) I never knew what I had until I lost it!

A break is a firm break up but with a waste of time! If you have problems at work you should find a refuge in your partner, where he/she would be the only thing that’s going right in your life. If your partner is not everything you dreamt of then how the hell did you waste so much time pretending to like him! People should stop bullshitting each other, when you wanabreak up just say the right words: “we gave it a try, it’s not working. It’s over, we don’t match.” Being sweet and fake won’t make it less painful, either ways you’re gona end up looking like a b*tch/asshole so why not do it right and get it over with!

                                                                                                                                                                                                  Marguerite Rahal

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